The lingering pain is normal.

Best Video Ever

The more and more I think about the chick with 3 tits the more I think of weird shit that I have watched in my life. I have personal experience with quite alot of fun stuff, ranging from bondage to putting things in a girls ass that would cause hemorrhaging. I can’t help but feel that I am missing out though, porn stars and drunk whores on the internet seem to be more adventurous than girls I find. I have yet to find a chick that gets of on being electrocuted, but I have seen a fuck ton of videos where they do. I feel as though I am being ripped off. I want to be able to jam my fist into a girls pussy and have her orgasm from it. I want to tie a girl up and suspend her from the ceiling and whip her till she gets off. Why do these girls exist only in porn or amateur videos!?!?

I will continue my search for this perfect girl. I doubt that I would marry her or date her for more than 5 months. I mean, its only a matter of time before that shit just gets really worn out and then it would no longer be fun to do that with her. I need to find a bunch of super kinky whores that I can rotate when I do things with them. I feel as though my life will be complete if this happens. Well, aside from dying inside due to only temporarily filling the emptiness in my soul with physical companionship. That doesn’t seem too bad now that I think about it.

Didn’t get everything that I wanted to get done this weekend. More importantly I didn’t get to even start on the anal violin. I really need to find a place that sells the emergency boxes for fire extinguishers. It’s a short work week this week, I will work on it during the 3 day weekend.

Sunday night I was surfing around the web looking for porn to download. I stumbled across the best thing ever, a porn with a chick who has 3 tits. You know how fucking amazing that would be? Three nipples to suck on! 3!!! I wonder if they are weighted slightly different so if she were to be on top, they would bounce differently. I don’t know if its fake or real, but I hope to god its real. That means women are finally evolving to a point where they can please men even more. Sure some guys might find it weird now, but give it time.

Oh, here is the link for some screenshots from the video. HIGHLY NWS

That’s right, its a video. I haven’t watched it yet, I want to make it a special moment for maybe a party. Everyone is drinking having a good time, then BAM! I stream that puppy on the PS3 and let everyone stare in amazement of the 3 tit lady! God DAMN I am extremely erect right now.

This weekend is full of things I need to do. Friends moving to a new place, friend needing a site redone with some awesome for when he launches his new shop and I need to drink. On my list is also to actually make the device that will be used in the anal violin. I will build a small enclosure similar to that of the “Break in case of emergency” boxes. I will put it in the living room so when random chicks come in and see it I get to explain what its for. That should go over well.

I can see them staring at it, afraid to ask what it’s for. I would then sneak up behind them and ask them if they like it. I would go into detail on how I hand crafted it from the finest materials known to man. If they question why there is bubble gun holding it together I will slap them. I would probably put my hand on their shoulder and start rubbing softly while I start to explain what its used for. Gradually squeezing harder as I start talking about pushing the pool ball into their ass with minimal lubrication is it doesn’t pop out easy.

I would then start breathing heavy as I explain why there is a guitar string on it. You know, maybe I should somehow rig up pickups on the thing and then see if I can make it into a legitimate musical instrument. I could go on tour with a bunch of whores and perform at strip clubs or some other adult entertainment businesses. Could get it so their moaning is also part of the act. Only thing that would suck is constantly changing whores. I can only imagine their assholes wearing out quickly and the balls just popping out on their own. Maybe I should devise a work out plan for their assholes to make it stronger…

Apparently I am a highly disturbed person. I got a comment yesterday on my post about having kids that just made me laugh. I don’t mind if I scare people with this or offend people, they just don’t exactly realize what I am going on about. Yes these are my thoughts and some of them may hold some truth, but this is an entertainment blog. You read this and have a laugh or a shock or whatever it is that you do when you read this. Personally I masturbate to what I write about sometimes, I can’t imagine that is too popular though. Best part about this comment though is they seem to have a hard time spelling things. Now I have a absolutely horrid time spelling, that is why I installed a spell checker on my browser.

So a word of wisdom to those who wish to comment, install a fucking spell checker. The best part is that I know who posts what, at least to an extent. So the person that made the post shouldn’t be making the errors that they made. When you go to college to become a teacher you think you would be extra careful and proof read shit. I feel sorry for the youth that will be taught by her, hopefully they will realize that she is retarded and then just kick her out.

They stated that I should seek help, why should I do that? I saw a bunch of shrinks back in the day, that proved to be a big waste of time. When a shrink just automatically wants to prescribe you pills, you need to tell them to fuck off. I think I am fine, yeah I’m a broken man and on the inside I am dying and seek the love of others that I cannot have, but for the most part I am better and more awesome than all of you combined. So fuck off.

OK, enough of that. I am starting to think that my workouts are working out something that I didn’t exactly intend to work out. There are exercises you can do that works out some muscles that allow you to sustain longer erections and better erections. I will have to search for some articles about this, but this may be why I seem to just be erect all the time. I can’t really complain yet, I have alot of porn to go through still and I rather be stroking my cock while doing that.

This whole thing will also make the kilt at the wedding thing a lot more interesting.

Tried some new workouts yesterday and pretty much wiped myself out. I decided that it was just going to be a day of gaming and put aside some web work and some house work. Loaded up some Counter-Strike and headed to one of the servers I recently frequent. Now, in game you can spray a image, my buddy has one that is similar to his in-game name. They then asked me why I didn’t have a cool spray. I had to inform them that any spray of mine would be highly inappropriate and would probably merit a ban from the server. This peaked their interest and thus I ended up explaining what exactly a anal violin is.

To those of you who don’t know, a anal violin is where you take a pool ball and drill a hole through it. When you have done so you then insert a string from a violin or some kind of string instrument. You now have the basic assembly of the device, now find a woman that likes to have things inserted into her ass. Take the ball and put it in there, obviously it will take a little bit of work, unless she inserts things like bats and bottles in there. Then you should probably find a new girl to play with. Once it’s in there pull on the string so its tight, make sure the ball doesn’t pop out though. With the string pulled tight grab a violin bow and start to run it back and forth like you were playing a violin. You could probably pluck it like a guitar or something similar to achieve the same results. What it does is vibrate the ball in a odd fashion and if the girl likes it she will pretty much sky rocket to ecstasy immediately. If she is not fond of it make sure you run the bow faster or pluck it harder till she likes it.

Once I explained it to them there was a short silence throughout the server. Everyone then agreed that it wasn’t that bad and would be all for seeing a picture of that being done to a girl. One of the people who agreed on that was a girl as well so I suspect she will be trying that with her significant other shortly.

OH, for those who found my issue with working out and becoming erect for a very long period of time interesting, it is still doing it. I am still on the prego kick as well.

I think I am extremely broken inside. Yesterday when I got home from working out I had this erection that wouldn’t go away. I figured I must have just worked out enough and now blood is just pumping wherever the fuck it wants to go. To remedy the situation I just loaded up some porn and jacked it. Well that didn’t cure it. Loaded up some different porn and away I went again. No dice. I figured it would go away in due time so I just went off and did my normal thing online that doesn’t involve porn.

Cruising the social networking sites I saw a friend post something about a pregnant woman. He was bitching about something, then I got to thinking. Pregnant women are hot, at least the ones that I have had experience with. One was a little more involved than the others but regardless, hot all the same. Their tits get bigger and they get horny for some reason. A very big plus is that you can also cum in them as much as you want and guess what?! They can’t get pregnant cause they already are!

So at this point my erection is worse but a game plan was formed. I downloaded a bunch of pregnant porn and after a couple of hours the erection finally subsided. We will see if this trend continues, I don’t want to get sick of masturbating.

Spring is starting to finally rear its head. This time of year is my favourite. Being couped up all winter, bitching about the cold, going out is just a hassle cause of things like snow and ice. Spring brings a much refreshing and needed change. Cars that are kept in storage get to come out, grilling out in the back while drinking a beer, fires and all the fun things that warm weather brings. One very important thing happens thought, the girls start to wear less clothing. That makes me happy beyond anything else in this world.

Then we get to see the twins as well. I LOVE when women bring the twins out to play. Those beautiful, bouncy and voluptuous globes (or whatever their shape may be. I don’t discriminate, as long as I can suck on them.) are THE highlight of spring. When I go out to have my morning cig at work its nice to sometime see the girls in short shorts and a sports bra just jogging along. If their jugs are impressive enough that sports bra has no chance of preventing them from bouncing gloriously. I always sit there and try to will them to fall out, they don’t want to be contained like that! THEY WANT TO BE FREE! LET THEM OUT!

Speaking about jogging, I am start a interesting work out routine that involves me not jogging. I need to get in shape for my buddys wedding, I plan on incorporating a zip line or some kind of crazy antic. I figure if I wear a kilt and zip line down to where I have to stand, it will lend to be the best wedding gift anyone could give.

So my birthday happens to be on the 15th of March. That is a very special day in history, the Ides of March. For those who don’t know, http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ides_of_march, Ceaser was murdered by a friend. So every year I fully expect to be murdered by a friend, thus I never hold a party on my birthday. I usually try to stay inside all day and make minimal contact with the outside world. I am not exactly a superstitious or paranoid person, but fucking hell I don’t want to get stabbed to death on my birthday.

So that is it for now.

I have determined that the state of the world is in worse shape than I previously thought. The amount of idiots that are being produced is staggering. Dealing with people is not exactly my strong suit. I enjoy the company of a select few and pretty much have complete hate for everyone else. There is justification for this, I fucking hate people who are stupid. The only time it’s OK to be stupid is if you are a female and like to take your clothes off. I won’t date you, but I will gladly stare at your body if you are good looking. Recently a friend made a comment about how a establishment that recently opened up in the area is garbage because of the people that go there. He used the term ghetto to describe it. An uproar ensued and people started to call him racist. What the fuck, are you people that fucking stupid? It’s ghetto because of the type of people that show up and their attitudes. White people and Black people were there and he mentioned the white trash only. If you are going to pull the race card just fucking shoot yourself.

He mentioned that there was a chick there that was all tatted up and had a black eye. Now that is just plain hot. Tats are hot on a chick, but add a black eye? That means she likes it rough. She has to cause she is still with the guy. Or she is that fucking pathetic and just takes it. If that is the case she needs to be hit a couple more times till she realizes that she needs to do something about that. I like to think that she just likes it rough, you know screams to be punched in the face while being fucked. Any chick who likes it rough and takes it to a certain degree is OK in my book.

The whole situation pissed me off, people who instantly pull the race card have no legitimate response to an argument or opinion. If you have the inability to properly engage in a argument and bring up valid points just shut the fuck up. Things like this make me want to punch babies and I like babies. Until they become retarded fussy and wont shut the fuck up despite the fact that you are there giving them the attention and other needs they have. Then they can go fuck themselves.